Tricia, My Passion, My Muse Aug. 1984
Jan. 2, 1966 - March 28, 2000
The persective of the photographer is a very important make up of photos that are taken, and why they are taken. The perspective I am talking about today isn't the physical, but insted the emotional. It is more times than not the emotional perspective that guides the photographer to the position from where they take their photo (s). That is why it has such an impact. I am posting the following autobiography, because it has directly, or indirectly impacted every shot I have snapped since August 1984. Enjoy.
So you know from where I come.
This is an important part of photography...perspective of the photographer.
I was a kid at the time when I went to Mackinaw Island for a LCMS youth gathering for all of the High schools in the state of Michigan. We were all staying at a conference center that is now known as Mission Point Resort.
Mission Point Resourt on Mackinac Island, MI
I was to meet up with a friend, Wendy P. that had moved to another part of the state, but just before the gathering her dad took a call to be a Pastor way out in southern Ca. I was all alone at the opening night mixer/dance. It was being held on a dance floor on the roof of one of the buildings. The night was perfect. Full moon over looking Lake Huron and not a cloud in the sky. As I stood there all alone, missing my friend, I just said the simple prayer..."Lord, just let me find someone to dance with." I decided that I was going to ask 5 girls to dance, and if nobody said yes, I would go back to my room. I asked the first girl, she said no... I asked another, and she said she wasn't interested...the next 2 said thank you, no... The 5th girl, Teri Jerome, said no, I just want to be with my friends. I began to turn away, when a small voice came from behind the girl that turned me down, saying, "I'll dance with you."...it was Tricia. We spent the rest of the 4 days together, falling in love...teenage puppy love....
More to come....
Part 2...The time to grow...
When the days on the Island were over, we boarded our boats back to our homes, we both cried.
(Playing on a seesaw before heading home on different boats. My favorite picture of all that I have ever taken)
We wrote back and forth to each other for the next year or so. Tricia went back to her family farm in Reede City, MI. Her mom & step-dad were far from rich, and were divorced shortly after & Tricia, her mom, sister & 2 brothers moved to Lansing Mi. By this time the letters had slowed to almost nothing. Tricia was enjoying life as well as she could.
School wasn't very easy for her, she was dyslexic, She decided that she needed to get out of town, so she took a live in nanny position for a family in Texas, but that didn't go so well. It pretty much ended the letters.
I, Dan, went back home, back to Woodhaven & Carlson High school. I dated a couple of different girls, but I never saw them in the way that I could see them as my forever love. Actually I saved that for my notes & letters...I would sign them at the beginning as Friends Forever, and as things went on to Love Forever. Nothing special happened in this time period to me, except I got my first SLR. My only other life passion was sparked into full flame...Photography. I then went, sorta...commuter student, to Eastern Michigan University.
As I was working my way through school as a historical guide at The Henry Ford Museum & Greenfield Village, and later as a photographer for Auto Trader. Tricia was having some major problems in her life to deal with. She was walking in downtown Lansing when she had a grand maul seizure. She also came to the realization that her first expirence was really a case of date rape...she suppressed certain parts of the event. She was doing different jobs to get by, as she was taking classes at the local community college.
I was either in class, working, or on the road between school, home & work. I think I was the first real threat to the water tower...EMU students know what I'm talking about.
The fall of 1989 was going well for me. I was in school, and enjoying life. It wasn't so good for Tricia, she had a just broken up with a summertime boyfriend, she was working, but not feeling to good. She thought she had a walking flu when she was taken to the family dr. The Dr was sure it was just another case of the flu or a bad chest cold, but to be on the safe side he ordered a chest x-ray...that's when he saw it.
More to come later...
Part 3... Pair of Hearts
Tricia's Dr looked at the x-ray, with all expectation of seeing either nothing or signs of something not too major. Instead what he saw broke his heart, for he had been her Dr for a long time, What he saw was a heart that was more than twice the size it should be. Not good. She was sent to a near by cardiology dept at a local hospital. It was an infection of the heart muscle. She had no other options but a heart transplant. The long, it seemed to the family, but surprisingly short wait for a new heart began.
I was just going on with my life in 89. I was taking the summer off from having a day job that summer, so I could take a few classes that I needed. Life was good for me, except that I wasn't dating anyone. I was pathetic. I would go to sleep I would pray to see who I would marry. The funny thing is that the only person that ever came up in those dreams was a vision of a young, beautiful woman I had known for really only 3 days & hadn't talked to or heard from in years. So I brushed it off as just another crazy dream.
Tricia was now going through all the testing & doing everything the Dr.'s and her family were asking to do to keep going. She went from hospital to hospital all over the Midwest to find the right team to do the operation, if a heart came available. She at this time had met a law school student, Chris, she went out with him a couple of times, it was a good distraction for her at this time. He was there for her at the time, but her didn't like him. They knew it wasn't a good thing, but their concerns were elsewhere. The decided to stay in Michigan for the procedure, they chose the University Of Michigan Medical Center to do the job.
As the fall came & went nothing much happen for me. I was still just another EMU Huron student...this is the time period when they made the decision to changed their name to the Eagles. The funny thing is that the U of M hospital & EMU are only 10 miles apart. It was a bit strange that year for me, for some reason seemed to spend all of my free time between classes in Ann Arbor...spitting, into a strong wind, distance from the hospital...if I had only known.
Tricia at this time had been admitted to the hospital and was waiting. She was emotionally & physically at the breaking point. She was ready to "home", so one day they came in and told her & the family that they had a heart for her. Tricia turned it down. She wasn't ready for it, it was a devastating blow for the Dr.'s & the family. She just wanted to go home to heaven. Her mom & family were there for her, but she how hurt they were, so she took it to God. She said that she begged him to take her home, but she would take the next one, if it came available...almost never happens, usually they take you off the list, but they didn't think she understood what was happening, so they didn't. She did improve enough to go home from the hospital for the holidays.
I just spent the holidays with my family & went to Orlando on our Christmas brake. Nothing special.
February 14th 1990 comes along and I am all alone, nothing new for me. Just another snowy day in Michigan, as far as I was concerned. Not for Tricia.
For Tricia the day started out with her having a secluded Dr.'s appointment, but she was having a hard time finding someone to drive her there. Mom was sick, sister had to work, brothers had school & work. It came down to her grandma, she made a few calls & somehow worked it out to drive her the 70 miles, in a blizzard. At this time all the way down in North Carolina, a family of a 24 year old woman were having the worst day of their life, they lost a loved one In a car accident. With this passing, ball began to roll all around the country, The race was on.
In His time... part 4...
Yes the race was on, to get a heart from North Carolina to Ann Arbor Michigan. To get Tricia the 70 miles to n Arbor from Lansing. Normally this wouldn't be too much of a problem, but that day all of southern Michigan & northern Ohio were having a blizzard.
It was hard enough to find someone to drive her down for what everyone had thought was just to be a normal Dr appointment, not the surgery, but Tricia & her grandma were on the road heading to the hospital when they called to tell them the good news.
The Dr.'s wee having to fly down to North Carolina, and get back to Ann Arbor in just a few short hours... too much time & the heart would be useless. The flight down & everything in Carolina went fine. Things got interesting on their return...the weather caused the private plane to be diverted from Ann Arbor to Toledo Oh. About 60 miles away. It took a police escort to get the heart up US 23 to U of M medical center just in time to do the operation. As they did the surgery and were removing the enlarged heart that was so damaged that it literally fell apart in their hands. Trice said later that she could see this happen from outside herself, The new heart took over & did fine. After the surgery, when Tricia saw her mom for the first time, her mom cried, for she could see her daughter with the color of life again, for in the time she was waiting she had turned almost ash gray, everyone said. Judy (Tricia's mom) cries a river of tears of joy that Valentines day...There was never a better heart ever given to anyone for a Valentine day.
I was still just plugging away at school, deciding what to do for the rest of my life I was told that I needed to declare a major to graduate, so after some consideration & discussions with the university, we figured out that I had all but a couple of classes done in 2 separate areas... History & Sociology, great if you want to be a teacher, and deep down that is what I thought I would like to do. So, I went and talked to my dad, who had at the time been tacking for 30 years and asked him what I should do. I said, "dad, I want to be a teacher. " He said, "Please don't." He told me how it was when he came out of school and how it had changed. He didn't think it was at the time a good move for me. He was right. I would have to figure out my life later on.
Tricia on 2/21/1990 by her mom @ U of M Hospital
Tricia spent a good bit of the next few months in the hospital getting things all set with all the meds, not being able to work, having to give up her cat, and having to move out of her moms place. That last one was forced by social security rules at the time. She also decided that the guy that had been there all through this for her wasn't what she really wanted in her life. It was easy to have someone there for you when you don't see having a future, but things had changed. The hard thing was that he didn't want to accept this, so he went back to his home in New Jersey, but somehow continued to call & stalk her. With all of this happening & all the medications she was now on, depression soon set in.
I on the other had had found a great summer job that paid me just to drive around & take pictures of people selling their cars, boats, & other stuff...I worked for Auto Trader, I made over $8K that summer & fall...and back in 1990 that could pay for a lot of school & other stuff. I was going to take a real spring break. I was going to go on a Windjammer Barefoot Cruise.
It was January, now and the day that I couldn't get my deposit back on my trip had just passed. I had been up at school all day & got home (parents) after 10 pm. I was so tired just fell fast asleep on the couch, my mom through a blanket over me, and turned off the ringer on the phone. Around 2 am my mom came downstairs & woke me up....
Part 5...His time comes....
Mom came down & woke me up to tell me that she just got a call from a girl named Tricia, and she said she met me at Mackinaw Island. She just wanted to see if the number she found in some old letters was still a good number for me. She also asked her to tell me that she had had a heart transplant, and that she was o, but would like me to call her if I got a chance. After about a 1/2 hour...about 2:30 am...I couldn't wait to talk to her. I was on the phone that morning for more than 2 hours. We decided to meet a couple o days later in Lansing, where she was living. I had never been to Lansing before. I got lost trying to find her apartment. When I finally found it she came down to meet me & we went across the street to her mom & sisters place...the sister that turned me down for a dance. She actually told Tricia, before I came up that she thought I was a great guy.
So I met the mom on the first time I see Tricia in 7 years. We went out to see a movie, and dinner, we sat & talked, caught up some more, and just had a great time. I called her when I got back home, 2 hours later...about midnight, we talked for a while longer & talked each day for the next week by phone & I drove the drive another time just to be with her, to be her friend.
We then after a couple more trips up to Lansing, she came back for a weekend to meet my family & to where I lived. We were just really good friends, at the time, we ha a passion for each other that went beyond anything either of us had ever experienced. I actually did something just as we were pulling out heading back to her home, when I asked her for I was already knowing where I thought we were heading, so I asked her "Hypothetically, if I asked you to marry me, what would be your answer?' she just said I cant say yes yet. We held hands all the way back. Life was good getting better.
We thought everything was going perfectly, until we got into her apartment to see 20 messages on her phone, all from her old boyfriend from New Jersey. 20 calls in about 40 hours...there were probably more, but he ran out the recording time & counter. If you have ever heard the crazy, scary crazy stuff people can say. He called just as we were walking in. she took the call & even though I was standing 10 feet away I could sill here him clearly. It took her over 20 minutes to tell him off. He hung up finally.
For the next couple of weeks, as we drew closer, he didn't stop calling & doing as much ha rrssament as you could do from New Jersey in the early 90's. We were both praying that something would bring his harassment to an end. We didn't think it would be an end like it turned out to be. He just upped & died on the golf course, while playing in New Jersey. Tricia found out from his mom. They actually liked each other They both relaxed that the nightmare of what Chris was doing was finally over for Tricia, but it was still a sad day for her, so when she called to tell me, I drove right up to comfort her. That night, with all the emotions in the air we finally let our passion go to full bloom, it was my first time.
June was now approaching, I cashed in my cruise, so I could finish up my studies as soon as I could...I finished all my classes by August that year. We got a bit of a scare when she thought she was late, so when she went in for standard Doctors exam for her, they did a test for her. (We bought the wrong size one day...too small to even get on at all.) We had talked through our options as I drove her back to her home, before one of my evening classes. She was going to have the results by mid class break. I took my 15 min break to call her. She told me that she wasn't, it sorta broke both of our hearts that she wasn't. I though was wasn't going to stop loving her, I was actually just beginning to love her, so I decided to just do it...to ask her again, with out any hypatheticals, so I said "Tricia, will you..." She was yelling in the phone yes, yes, yes. I was stuck, happily, with what question I was asking.
Part 6...Happily after all...
So, I had to ask it..
We got engaged between classes for me, over the phone & without the question, at the time, ever being asked. Life is good. I went home happy, and told my mom what had happened. The first thing she said wasn't that we needed to get a ring now. So we did the next time we saw each other. We went to the local mall, foe we saw a few there the last time we went shopping. We went in & I told her to get what ever she wanted, so she went around the store, looking at all the rings & came across what was one of the smallest diamond solitaires they had, 1/4 karat. Its what she wanted, she had small hands & she didn't want it to be too big for her to live with. It was all her. As we were waiting for all the paperwork to get done, this was 1991, we saw & both of us entered a drawing they were having for a $500 shopping spree, it was something to pass the time. We then drove back to my parents.. home & showed the ring to my mom & sister, they went all goo-eyed over it. Everything was good, them my godmother & uncle invited us over, they had heard that she had accepted, & wanted to see the happy couple. We didn't think too much of it, it was just my godmother & uncle. Two very special people to me, for outside of her being my godmother, which is a very important position to Lutherans, because of the sacrament of baptism. It was also that my Uncle Nick was a survivor. He had come over after the was a young man & done a few things, including a jeweler. He did something at his retirement, from being a jeweler, 20 years before. He put away for all of his nieces & nephews, if they wanted them, engagement rigs. We were the last of them. The ring that Tricia chose, somehow, was a perfect match for the rings that had been waiting for u for 20 years. They are he rings I have around my neck in my profile picture.
The following months went by way too fast, but good times always do. I graduated from college, My 7-day-older cousin, best friend, fell in love with a special country girl. Her & Tricia became good friends. So the 4 of us were running around southern Michigan that summer as happy & carefree as 2 couples could.
There was only one small hick-up that year, After the scare & much discussion between the Dr.'s, our families, & ourselves. Tricia & I had to make a very hard & heart-breaking decision. We couldn't have kids. I sill cry every fathers day that I never could be the father of Tricia's kids & the more painful realization that she couldn't be a mother to my kids. The risk for Tricia, the baby, or both to die, or worse...sever birth defects were the reverse of the Mega-Millions odds. Some times it's just not meant to be.
The seasons passed quickly, We spent Christmas / New years in Florida, where we had Tricia's birthday...Jan 2nd...Life Was good.
Cousin Rusty got married on Valentine's Day, so we spent her 2nd anniversary of her transplant at a church watching 2 o our best friends get married. They still are & have a brood now running around Texas. Tricia didn't quite understand why, but she was feeling real bad that she wasn't sharing the day with her mom & family. She talked herself into believing that we would make it up next year. We were now deep into the prep for our wedding, set for May 16, 1992.... We had the church, the hall, the best man & maid of honor...we had almost everything. We were just missing 2 things.
1) Presents for the bride..s maids. Tricia really wanted to get them all something special, just from her alone. She was stumped at what she could do for them, then just a couple of weeks before the big day we get a call from the place where we bought her ring. She had won the shopping spree...Tricia had won $500 for anything she wanted in the store, so she got all of the girls in the wedding, flower girl to maid of Honor, and Tricia's mom all had new matching real pearl earrings. My sister wore hers on her wedding day; my niece wore hers to her graduation just last year. From not having anything for them, to all of them having heirlooms to b passed on for generations to come.
2) We were also wondering why the minister that was to officiate wasn't getting back to us on what we needed to work on to help make our marriage a success. So a sunday a couple of weeks before the big day, all he could say was that there was only one area that we needed to work on...money, and the only reason why we needed to work on that is the fact that we didn't have any.
The Wedding day came & it was beautiful It was in the mid to upper 80's & sunny in Lansing. To keep me & the guys happy us guys went out to a local golf course, and played around. There were about 20 of us in all out playing that morning, and I did the only thing I remembered of the whole day, I chipped in for birdie. Tricia, on the other hand was not feeling too good. She had a bad case of the flu. It was still the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. Life was good...very good...My dreams & Prayers had been answered...and in ways far beyond my wildest dreams.
....
Later that year, life threw us a nasty cure, Tricia's mom died unexpectedly. She was only 46.
>>>>
The following 7 years were full great joy, but not wealth for us. We lived life to the fullest, a diabetic & heart transplant couple could. Neither of us had any major health problems, we just enjoyed every day we had together. I found that my greatest moments of my life were the times I watched Tricia live hers.
:-( :- ( :- ( :- (
Tricia passed on to The Promised Land at 7:09 am March 28, 2000.
Life is good...because HE lives, and so does Tricia. She's just waiting for me.
This is my life story, and inspiration to take the best pics I can. I will work on adding pics to it soon...tech problems when I brought it over to the blog.
Dan Thompson
..........................................
HERE IT IS...
How I know she's alright....she sorta told me...
The night she died, I went to my mom & dad's for a couple of days, as we got everything taken care of with the arrangements. I dozed off on their sofa, again. I woke up & couldn't get back to sleep, it was about 3 am, again. I was flipping through the channels on their TV...a new 36"...when I came across CMT. The remote came to a dead stop. It would not go up or down the dial. The song that was playing was a song called "She's More"...by ???. The very next song was a little tune that runs 3:16 long..."I'm Alright"...It has a part of it that goes..."The skies has cleared, the sun is bright, I'm with a friend, and I'm alright..." As soon as the song was over, the remote went back to working just fine.
********************************************
Peace
Dan
From www.LHM.org daily devotions
Rebuilding the Ruins"
July 8, 2006
"I will ... restore its ruins, and built it as it used to be." Amos 9:11
Constantine's Arch is a tourist attraction in Rome. Unlike many such monuments, it was not built of new material. Constantine, the first Christian emperor, used the ruins of ancient Rome to build his triumphal arch. It stands as a symbol of a Christian empire rising from pagan rubble.
Joseph's life was in ruins. His own brothers had turned on him, and he faced a bleak future as a slave in Egypt. But when Joseph could no longer control his life, God stepped in. And Joseph became a great man who saved many people, including his own family.
God delights in taking the ruins of our lives and rebuilding them into His temple. It's when, by God's grace, we see our utter helplessness that we let Him take over. And as we give our lives to Him, He takes those broken stones and one by one, step by step, builds a beautiful cathedral, a life dedicated to His worship and praise.
Today I take the rubble of my life -- the willfully destroyed relationship, the pride that won't let me admit I made a mistake, the jealousy that has replaced love with hate -- and bring it to Christ for forgiveness and rebuilding. He delights in making a temple out of me!
PRAYER: Direct Your steps, O Lord, to the ruins I make of my life, and work Your salvation in the midst of them; in Jesus' name. Amen.
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I still cry myself to sleep some nights, when I can get to sleep...only out of exaustion, please pray for me.
She's waiting for me now...
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